I had a moment yesterday while driving to Taco Bell.
Over the past year I have been valuing youth a lot more. I'm 22 right now, and it feels like my youth will be very short. I am in a scramble right now to suck the most out of it which I guess manifests into some kind of hedonistic trait. So I feel like it is important for me and people in general to take advantage of being young, beautiful, and lustful when they have the chance. For me, and for some reason, I do not feel like I am going to live very long. Don't ask why, but this constant need to get something done cannot be for no reason. Besides, I've been feeling this from high school, that karma probably is injected into the universe quite stubbornly now.
Is this a midlife crisis? That means I'll live to be 44.
So I care about fashion now, which is ironic in that when my family was doing well I didn't care for half a shit. Now that we are fucking broke and on the verge of homelessness among other things, I care a lot. I want to indulge, and I want to accomplish ambitions, before my youth runs out. I want to be a fucking genius, so I read constantly. I write. I think. Because its never enough.
There are so many fucking movies I need to see.
Live below your means during the day, live like a superstar during the night.
Leave a body of work that is impressive, dazzle people with intellect.
Always try and look your best. Make them want to fuck you. Just avoid kids and diseases.
Life is too short to try and prolong it.
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I love this. I agree completely. I never gave a shiit about what I looked like. My mother always tried to get me to dress like a girly but I hated it. And now all I want are dresses but also, mi mother can not afford to do that for me anymore. Boo. And I totally agree, we're young, but honestly we will be good (looks wise) for at least another 10 years. As long as you take care of your body (eat right, work out, and work on your spirituality) you're golden. And with those things comes all the lust factors when people look at you. And the best part is seeing that you have a super hott girlfriend... you're not available... people will die over it :)
ReplyDeletecheers to you!